After I finished crying in the shower and obsessively rinsing my eyes with bleach, I sat down to digest Biden’s State of the Union, which I watched in full so you didn’t have to. You’re welcome. Now I know why Marco Rubio skipped it. Read on for the sanitized details.

🗞THE STATE OF THE UNION 🗞

First, Biden made a promising start by seeming alert and not sleepy. Remind me to find out what he takes. The House chamber was only about three quarters full, partly because guests were not allowed, but also because it seems a lot of folks simply didn’t attend. I only counted four Supreme Court justices, for example. Not a popular venue, apparently.

Because of science — well, political science, anyway — the House members weren’t required to socially distance and were not required to mask. There were maybe a dozen maskers in view here or there but 90%+ were face free. Ironically, Covid cases and deaths are higher this year than when Biden addressed a masked Congress last year.

The speech itself was everything we expected and everything that was predicted (or suggested) by leftwing media. On the surface, it was intended to be a triumphant “unity” speech that courageously confronted the real problems facing this country by bravely ignoring them. Biden said that under his awesomely effective leadership, America has been brought together by the war, by Covid, and by our fundamental longing for freedom, et cetera, et cetera.

If you could find the Americans down in the lower levels of Washington DC’s dungeons where conservative tresspassers are chained up, I wonder what the January 6 defendants think about all this new unity. Or the unvaccinated Americans that Joe said he’d protect jabbed Americans from. I wonder if they are feeling the unity just now?

Just beneath its over-polished surface, the speech was a delusional attempt to co-opt conservative ideas and bribe Americans into supporting Democrats in the Congressional elections through offers of vast new transfer payments and taxes that will make inflation even worse. Biden’s team clearly did NOT learn anything from studying the Carter presidency.

Ironically, Biden began his speech praising citizens who heroically stand up to tyrannical, overreaching governments and defend their children. Not moms. He meant Ukranians.

The most hilarious feature of the speech was Biden’s ghastly and inept attempt to co-opt conservative messaging. As democrats kept leaping to their feet to applaud punch line after punch line, Biden claimed he was going to:

📌 crack down on illegal immigration (after manufacturing a gigantic crisis on the border), I am not making that up,

📌 lower prescription drug prices (after revoking Trump policies that actually did lower most drug prices, like insulin),

📌 re-fund the police (after leading a two year charge to de-fund them),

📌 support the troops (after getting them killed in a hasty Afghanistan withdraw and using them as human pincushions for experimental drugs),

📌 rebuild manufacturing capacity and direct the government to “Buy American” (after encouraging employers to fire unjabbed employees and discriminate against them, and locking down US manufacturing for a year — just ask Elon Musk, who had to move his whole operation to Texas),

📌 cutting child-care costs “in half,” somehow (after driving costs up astronomically by quarantining school-age kids every ten minutes using witless contact tracing),

📌 crack down on social media giants (after pressuring them to become vastly powerful government censors),

📌 end inflation by lowering the deficit (after almost doubling the amount of circulating currency and while calling for even more infinitely expensive programs),

📌 cure cancer (after coercing Americans into taking jabs with known cancer risks), and

📌 support mental health (after bombarding adults with military-grade propaganda and mentally torturing kids for two years).

Gee, I guess all those conservative talking points are resonating with the people for some reason. On the other hand, completely missing from the Former Vice-President’s speech was any reference to: equity, diversity, critical race theory, Black Lives Matter, police violence, gender reassignment, Afghanistan, student loans, unvaccinated people, school board investigations, January 6th insurrectionists, Capitol attackers or even rioters, misinformation, disinformation, Fauci, Walensky, overwhelmed hospitals, China, the CDC, or the FDA.

In fact, I’m starting to think we need to put the little faces of normal liberal talking points on the sides of milk cartons, because it looks like they might have been kidnapped or something. I can’t begin to tell you how bizarre it was to see democrats clapping like trained seals begging for fish when Biden said he’s going to stop illegal immigration at the border using high-tech sensors and Mexican patrols.

Please.

As you can imagine, Biden was light on details, but the details he did provide gave the game away. Democrats intend to skin conservative ideas, put the skins on like costumes, and walk around wearing the conservative skin suits while demanding respect and votes in November.

For example, Biden said, twice, he was going to “fund the police, not de-fund the police,” like the idea of de-funding the police is a totally brainless idea that only a halfwitted moron would suggest. Of COURSE. Duh. But Biden proposed to “fund” his proposed $350 billion dollar package for police by offering them training programs and new “resources.” Haha, it’s the old Trojan horse technique! He’s going to offer local police a bunch of money, but it will have lots of sticky federal strings attached, strings that mutate into grasping tentacles as soon as you shut off the lights for the day.

In other words, Biden is going to try to federalize the police by “fixing” the funding problem that he created. It’s the Stalin technique. First, starve the chicken, rip off all its feathers, then offer it a few pieces of corn. It comes running right back to good old Uncle Joe! You have to admit, it’s diabolically clever.

I could go through every one of his “proposals” and show you how he’s really going to do the EXACT OPPOSITE of what he promised.

For another example, he said he’ll fight inflation — which was caused by a virus, by the way, you probably didn’t know viruses could do that — he’s going to fight it by raising taxes on corporations to 50% minimum, and 130 other countries are, supposedly, going to do the same thing to stop corporations from moving to favorable tax jurisdictions. Biden says 50% is plenty of profit for corporations. So.

The problem with his harebrained tax scheme is that CORPORATIONS DON’T PAY TAXES. They just COLLECT taxes. Taxes are just an expense to corporations. CUSTOMERS pay the taxes and the corporations pass the money on to the government so that the government can give the money to politically favored grifters. Just not you. If taxes — especially broad across-the-board taxes — go up, corporations just increase the price of their goods and services accordingly.

Which means HIGHER PRICES for everybody and everything. In other words, more INFLATION. Exactly the opposite of what Biden says his nitwit policy is supposed to do. They think we’re babbling idiots that will lap up whatever they serve on White House plasticware.

The most terrifying proposal had to be when he said he’s creating a NEW medical agency — ARPA-H, which will be based on DARPA, the military technology agency, to “improve” all our healthcare. I guess even Biden realizes the CDC and NIH are useless. And this is just what we need — a new militarized federal health agency. What could possibly go wrong?

And, I’m sorry, ARPA-H is the dumbest name in a long string of dumb names.

While pounding the lectern and calling for rebuilding American manufacturing, he also said he’s going to direct Merrick Garland and the DOJ to aggressively pursue businesses who “fraudulently” collected PPP money during the pandemic. I wonder how they’ll pick targets for investigation by the new agency? I wonder if it will look a lot like the J6 investigations?

If you took a PPP loan that was “forgiven,” you might want to start getting all your paperwork in order. Just saying.

Now for the Covid part. Late in the hour-long speech he got around to Covid, admitting Americans were tired and frustrated with the pandemic. You don’t say. But, due to his administration’s clever response, we can now “move on.” He said “Covid-19 need no longer control our lives.” But he said we aren’t going to just “live with Covid.” No. We’re not quitters. We’re going to fight! Fight the virus. He said he had a “four point plan” and then made about nineteen points. What can I tell you, math is hard.

Maybe we’ll have better luck beating Covid than we’ve had with flu. Because science!

Oh, and Biden still thinks the vaccines stop infections. He said, “you can’t build a wall high enough to keep out a - a - a vaccine” — ironic; he meant virus, you know Joe — but “a vaccine can stop the spread of these diseases.” Somebody should probably tell him. Not me, you do it.

In summary, Biden made two main points about how the end of the pandemic is going to look: we’re going to vaxx the WHOLE WORLD — yes, he said that — and also give away A LOT of free stuff. Free “high quality” masks for when you feel anxious. Not that Chinese junk. Free tests for when you have a runny nose. Free Pfizer drugs for when the vaccines don’t work. Free, free, free, free. Olly Olly Oxen Free! Wheee!

But I think they tried to thread the needle a little too closely, trying to please everybody. They’re trying to end Covid without actually ending Covid. Not one word about mandates. Not one word about masks on planes. Not one word about discriminatory employment policies. And not one word about jab efficacy. He never used the words “safe and effective,” not once. I don’t think he ever even said “booster.” He certainly never mentioned that revolting cockroach Fauci.

And he never said, not one time, “follow the science.”

In other words, Covid mandates are moving underground. We’re going to keep hearing about Covid, a lot. We’re still going to have to fight to get masks off planes. We’re still going to have to take tests to travel, to get back in the country, and probably to get in restaurants and government buildings. Military and healthcare workers will still have to get jabs.

You didn’t think it was going to be THAT easy, did you?

This is what is going to torpedo the Democrats in November. They’re trying to keep too much.

The good news is the disastrous politics of Covid theater and virtue signaling got us to this moment, the moment when the obvious Covid restrictions finally fell, hard. We won the land war. We are now moving into Covid’s Cold War, where the battle lines will be hard to discern, the government will stop using the failed rhetoric of 2020-2021, and it will begin an Orwellian campaign to trick us into believing that the “new normal” isn’t new, it was always new. And if it was always new, it’s the same.

I found this comment in a tweet from Townhall.com, who quotes a response to the SOTU from a self-identified Bernie voter: “I believe the whole speech, the whole Biden speech, is gaslighting people with critical thinking skills.”

Townhall.com @townhallcom

A C-SPAN caller who didn't support Biden or Trump in 2020 but Bernie Sanders rips Biden's SOTU: "I believe the whole speech, the whole Biden speech, is gaslighting people with critical thinking skills."

She might be onto something. CNN’s analyst noted that Joe Biden’s approval is sliding with ALL Americans — including Democrats — and said that instant reactions to the speech suggested Biden failed to turn it around last night.

RNC Research @RNCResearch

CNN’s David Chalian says the “instant reaction” of Biden's #SOTU shows that Biden is losing support among all Americans, including Democrats.

Townhall.com @townhallcom

CNN's instant poll of SOTU viewers, which leans more Democratic, shows 41% had a "very positive" reaction to Biden's SOTU. Down 10% from last year's joint address. It's "the lowest 'very positive' we've seen in about the last 15 years of instant polling after the SOTU address."

Hilariously, and in keeping with the theme of stealing conservative talking points, Biden ended the SOTU with this line: “The State of the Union is strong. Because our people are strong!” But that was a line delivered by President Trump at one of his State of the Union addresses. More plagiarism, I guess.

Let’s see how much of a bump Joe gets from this. My hot-take is: not much.

🔥 Finally, in local news, during an extended late-night session ending long after the SOTU, Alachua County’s school board voted to terminate its odious superintendent Carlee Simon, who became a liberal media darling back in the day by famously defying Governor DeSantis and Florida’s optional mask rules. It took a lot of work, but it’s finally done, she’s gone.

Have a wonderful Wednesday, and I’ll round up some fun reactions to the SOTU for you tomorrow so we can see how the speech landed after everyone’s had a chance to digest it.

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Twitter: @jchilders98

☕️ Coffee & Covid 2022 🦠

☕️ Coffee & Covid ☙ Wednesday, March 2, 2022…