☕️ BEST LIFE ☙ Friday, September 15, 2023 ☙ C&C NEWS 🦠

Meet the (allegedly) Mexican Alien Mummy; NASA hires UFO chief; the people's uprising of London; Republicans focus on shady Chinese bio lab in California; Hunter indicted; probing pet questions; more.

Good morning, C&C, it’s Friday! Your roundup today includes: by popular demand, I deep-dive on the Mexican mummies story; NASA jumps on the alien bandwagon; a people’s uprising hits London’s grotesque 15-minute city plan; Republicans subpoena records on the shady Chinese warehouse bio lab; Hunter indictment;  UK Guardian asks pointed pet question; and a heartwarming Novak clip to get the last day of the work week started off right.

🗞💬 WORLD NEWS AND COMMENTARY 💬🗞

🔥 Usually I stay discretely out of these “hot take” stories, especially ones that are ultimately unresolvable, but this popularly-demanded story is almost seasonal for Halloween. And it has a surprise ending. NPR ran the spooky story Wednesday, which would have been more appropriate for late next month, headlined “Ufologist claims to show 2 alien corpses to Mexico's Congress.”

I know. Just stick with me.

Not to be outdone in its UFO arena by the diligence of the United States Congress, on Tuesday Mexico's Congress took testimony from several “extraterrestrial experts.” But the Telemundo hearing instantly sprang into international news when the first called expert dramatically unveiled what he claims are two mummified corpses of alien beings, a male and a female, with dry, chalky skin tightly stretched over brittle, bumpy bones.

The presenter claimed the unlikely pair were discovered in Peru in 2017, and estimated to be at least 1,000 years old.

To many observers, the bizarre “alien mummies” looked just like Chuck Schumer, 72, and Dianne Feinstein, 90, laying next to each other in tiny little alien coffins:

Schumer and Feinstein could not be reached for comment.

The presenter and mummies’ owner is a colorful character and we’ll look at him in a minute. But he has allowed (or sold access to) other alien researchers to take MRI’s and x-rays and DNA samples. Apparently someone even filed several of the samples with the NIH’s DNA registration database, albeit described as “Homo sapiens.”

The various scans of the doll-sized “aliens” show exciting and provocative internal features, including eggs in one of the pair, presumable the female, although sadly, it is now too late to ask for her preferred pronouns:

It’s 1,000 years too late to ask for her preferred pronouns

Self-described “ufologist” and “journalist” Jaime Maussan owns the mummies. This isn’t his first mind-blowing discovery of alien remains. He’s found them before! Jaime has become truly excellent at sniffing out alien mummies. In 2017, Jaime had five alien mummies in his show, er, that were making the rounds.

But science wasn’t too interested in Jaime’s five mummies at the time. Live Science ran an article in March 2018 headlined “These 'Alien' Mummies Appear to Be a Mix of Looted Body Parts.” It wasn’t clear whether the two presented to Mexico’s Congress this week were part of the original five or are new ones.

In 2021, the International Journal of Biology and Biomedicine published a study with three authors titled, “Applying CT-scanning for the identification of a skull of an unknown archaeological find in Peru.” They analyzed scans of the alien mummy skulls and concluded “the head of the small body is largely made of a deteriorated llama braincase.” Apparently, llama skulls develop face-like crinkles in the back when they decompose, so if you cut a llama skull in half and turn it around, do some careful carving to bring the features out better, Shazam, alien face.

In fairness, the researchers were limited because all they had were CT scans, and concluded their study offering three possibilities: (1) the mummies are ancient fakes made by ancient Peruvians for an unknown reason; (2) the mummies are modern fakes made by huaqueros who often sell elaborate hoax artifacts to gullible Westerners; or (3) they allowed that the mummies could possibly be “real animal entities, unknown to science.”

In another unfortunate comparison, online pundits have noted the close resemblance between the Mexican alien mummies and the aliens in the worst Indiana Jones movie ever, “Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull:”

Occam’s razor is an ancient rule that says, when faced with two competing explanations for a phenomenon, we should favor the simplest explanation requiring the fewest assumptions. Thus, Occam’s razor prefers the answer the mummies are an elaborate hoax, which is vastly more likely than is a new dwarf species of humans or even more unlikely, Crystal Skull aliens.

But … C&C’s UFO believers will correctly argue that so far, in spite of quite a bit of careful looking, the closely-guarded remains have not yet been fully or finally debunked. And some features of the little mummy bodies, revealed by x-ray, are not easily explained, such what appears to be a novel joint design.

I lean strongly toward hoax, but I freely admit, it can be exhausting trying to figure out whether the U.S. and Mexican governments are running a new alien-panic psyop, or whether the debunkers are running a UFO-hiding psyop.

What much more interests me is the fact that another government is now “officially investigating” UFOs and aliens. And coincidentally, it happens to be a government right next to ours. So, whatever “it” is, it’s spreading, some kind of intellectual pandemic. The time for saying these silly alien stories aren’t even worth discussing has expired, since our governments are now airing them in prime time.

Something happened over the last three years, and the official UFO discussion embargo has finally broken.

For some reason, instead of dismissing everything as a weather balloon, and gaslighting pilots and other witnesses, the government is now tripping over itself to prove our space brothers actually exist. How and why did that change?

A final comment. Can you imagine where we’d be right now if the two governments spent as much effort studying vaccine injuries as they are spending peering at grainy UFO videos and marveling at carnival tent specimens?

👽 In related news, this week NASA created a “Director of UAP,” who has not yet been assigned, or if he has, has not been named. Headline from Reuters, dateline yesterday:

Whatever “it” is, it has also spread to NASA, which in hindsight was probably inevitable.

🔥 The people are finally pushing back! The UK independent ran a highly encouraging story yesterday headlined, “Ulez camera vans vandalised and put out of use as opponents hit out.”

You may recall London’s recent step toward becoming a 15-minute city, the so-called “ULEZ” incentive plan, where non-smart cars, or ‘dumb cars’ I guess, are charged $16 every time they leave the driveway or hit the expressway. Later in the fall, the daily driver fee will shoot up to $224 per day (but an affordable $112 per day if you pay within two weeks).

The system was originally designed to run using special ULEZ traffic cameras (Ultra Low Emissions Zone). But after up to 50% of the stationary pole cameras had been vandalized  — sitting ducks, after all —  London moved to plan ‘B’, which is now employing roving Big Brother-style white-panel vans equipped with despised, roof-mounted fee-charging cameras.

But the organism evolves, and plucky opponents of the Mayor’s too-clever plan have also shifted tactics, and are now targeting the ULEZ vans, spray-painting camera lenses and windshields, and letting air out of tires. Londoners are also crowd-sourcing the current whereabouts of every ULEZ van, coordinating their efforts to help uncompliant drivers avoid being recorded.

Between the start of April and the end of August, 510 crimes relating to ULEZ cameras were reported. London’s Mayor Sadiq Khan, who expanded ULEZ from an inner zone to the entire city on August 29th, has scolded people attacking cameras that “protest should be lawful, safe and peaceful”, but adding encouragingly, “It is really important to stay on the right side of the law.”

That’s true. Just ask January 6th rally attendees.

Londoners, keep fighting. We are with you in spirit. Viva la resistance!

🔥 The Fresno Bee ran a story yesterday headlined, “Congressional Panel on Chinese Influence subpoenas materials on clandestine Reedley lab.”

Remember that weird, semi-abandoned warehouse in California that turned out to be a Chinese bioweapons lab masquerading as a covid test-making operation? The unlicensed, hidden-in-plain-sight lab was discovered by a scooter-equipped low-level Reedly official, after a nosy neighbor filed a report with codes enforcement because lab workers used an outside garden hose on the wrong day.

Yes, that’s apparently a crime in California.

That triggered a whole slew of agencies who invaded the lab in a series of investigatorial waves, starting with the local agencies and rapidly escalating to the CDC and the FBI. They found vials of blood, incubators, scientific freezers, dangerous chemicals, hundreds of frisky lab mice, viruses and bacteria including covid and even more exotic bugs like malaria, Hepatitis B and C, chlamydia, herpes and rubella Z — among others — and NONE of which are used in the production of covid test kits, which it turned out the State of California was paying the shady outfit to make.

One’s mind boggles with the possibilities. What was actually going into those covid tests? In my view, this story is yet another reason not to use them.

Somehow, during all that expensive and frenetic investigating, not one person associated with the lab was ever arrested, detained, questioned, had their statement taken, or even required to sign a hose violation notice. Apparently it was an unaccountable fly-by-night operation with an unlisted phone number ringing to a random live-eel wet market stall in Wuhan or something. “Herro?”

With no clear answers anywhere, the Republican House Committee on the CCP decided to get involved, and subpoena’d town officials.

This will shock you, but Politico, citing an unnamed source, said that a review of materials Reedley turned over in response to the House committee’s subpoena “has identified troubling gaps in safeguards that allowed the clandestine facility to operate with impunity, as well as serious deficiencies in the federal government’s response.”

Serious deficiencies? How could that happen. Inconceivable! By which I mean totally 100% conceivable.

In another not-so-shocking development, Committee Republicans have now established that the sketchy medical device companies that ran the clandestine facility, Universal Meditech Inc. and Prestige Biotech Inc., are tied to problematic Chinese companies and Chinese nationals. Believe it or not, these same organizations and their named officers are also implicated in major fraud investigations and other misconduct in multiple countries.

All of which somehow completely escaped notice of the State of California, which was paying the lab, handsomely, for making extremely questionable covid test kits with zero oversight. Not one visit. California never even tried the phone number. Thanks, Governor Newsom!

And, isn’t it too bad that you missed the test-kit bonanza? Had you known how little was required, maybe you could’ve gotten in on the covid test kit gold rush like all these Chinese terrorists did.

🔥 Now that his secret, small-print sweetheart deal was uncovered by the judge in his criminal case, Hunter Biden was indicted yesterday on a few minor, misdemeanor gun charges. It’s a developing story, but I don’t expect it to amount to much. But we’ll see.

Maybe some Republican State Attorney General should indict Hunter with state child porn charges on account of his laptop? Hmm?

🚀 Russia Today ran a story this week headlined, “EU states tell Zelensky they won’t hand over draft dodgers.”

According to the story, the only EU country to agree to extradite military-aged Ukrainian refugees was Poland. All the other countries have either deferred or refused.

Per Hungarian media reports, Poland has already started sending some Ukrainian men back. Russia Today reported that last month, former comedian and Ukraine President Zelensky fired all his draft commissioners, every single one, and ordered a fresh review of all previous medical exemptions to the draft, citing “widespread corruption.” Imagine that. In Ukraine of all places.

Apparently the officials were selling medical draft exemptions or something.

Not only that, but Zelensky tightened the rules, which now allow conscripting shirkers with mental health problems, chronic diseases, tuberculosis, and HIV.

Nothing could go wrong with that plan.

🔥 Following last week’s similar article encouraging people to stop selfishly having kids, the UK Guardian ran a mind-numbing piece Wednesday headlined, “The case against pets: is it time to give up our cats and dogs?”

Answer: no. Case closed.

But that’s not much fun, so let’s go ahead and see what the goofy wokesters are up to this time. I expected it to be related to climate change somehow, like because of all the carbon released making pet food or driving them to the dog park or something. But no.

Once again, their big objection is our human selfishness. Unvirtuous! Apparently, feeding them, walking them, snuggling with and petting them, de-lousing them, de-worming them, grooming them, and paying thousands of dollars for our pets’ medical care — is all TOTALLY self-centered, dummies.

Humans, explained an anti-pet “expert” cited for the article, unjustly “are extracting as much emotional support as we want from” our pets. In the expert’s view, it is definitely “a very selfish relationship.”

Another expert, presumably also a marxist, complained about the language we use to describe our relationship with our animals. She demands that people stop rudely saying they “own” animals, like by saying “I have a dog,” which violates animal human rights, or something, undermining their furry self-confidence. Instead, said the expert, we should only say that we “care for” our pets. Not “have” them.

Maybe she had a point. Admittedly, the animals can’t understand English and have no idea how we’re referring to the relationship, but maybe. You never know. Animals can be very intuitive.

Next, the article argued that pets “aren’t living their best lives.” Which is a crime against humanity to festival-loving, woke, hippie marxist anti-pet experts. According to another anti-pet expert, who used pet parrots as an example, “The boredom of animals is intense.” I am not making this up, but the Guardian then argued “fish are increasingly thought to be bored or stressed by tank life.”

Fish. Whose fishy brains are so small they can’t be seen with the naked eye.

The unstated alternative, to leave the animals to live their best lives in the wild, would certainly cure their boredom. Being chased by a hungry hawk or a predatory bigger fish is, admittedly, much more exciting than swimming laps around the fishbowl or repeatedly croaking “I love you” in exchange for birdie treats.

But … I’m just spitballing here … maybe we should check with the animals first, and see which lifestyle they prefer. Gilded cage? Or full-on Darwin, survival of the fastest?

For purposes of this story, I interviewed the Childers’ family housecat, ‘Kitty,’ about her preference. But she didn’t answer, and just languidly looked the other way, flicking her tail contemptuously, as if it were the stupidest question she ever heard.

I’m sorely tempted to treat this nonsense seriously, and point out things like how the law treats pets as property and does not recognize individual animal rights. If my dog bites someone, then I have to pay damages, not my dog. If I negligently run over someone’s cat, then I have to reimburse the crumpled cat’s owner for the veterinary expenses, not reimburse the cat.

But this nonsense is not serious, and these are not serious people. They are pitiable victims of mental illness. We just need to get them some treatment and stop pretending that anything they say is rational.

🔥 Finally, enjoy this short clip (2:30) of pureblooded US Open Men’s Champion Novak Djokovic being interviewed by John McEnroe, it will warm your heart:

Clip.

Have a fantastic Friday! Tomorrow morning, same time, we’ll be back serving more seasonal, farm-to-table Coffee & Covid for your informative pleasure.

We can’t do it without you. Consider joining with C&C to help move the nation’s needle and change minds.  I could use your help getting the truth out and spreading optimism and hope, if you can: https://www.coffeeandcovid.com/p/-learn-how-to-get-involved-

Twitter: jchilders98.
Truth Social: jchilders98.
MeWe: mewe.com/i/coffee_and_covid.
Telegram: t.me/coffeecovidnews
C&C Swag! www.shopcoffeeandcovid.com