☕️ DON’T MESS WITH TEXAS ☙ Wednesday, November 20, 2024 ☙ C&C NEWS 🦠

Texas makes President Trump an offer he can't refuse; Italy makes Dems an offer they can't refuse; State Dept. Chicken Hawks shelter in place; cables cut; Biden dissed by BRICS; trans silliness; more.

Good morning, C&C family, it’s Wednesday! Your white-hot roundup today includes: a surprising state office in Texas makes a bold and very welcome offer to incoming President Trump; perfect little Italian town makes irresistible offer to disgruntled Democrats; chicken hawks in Kiev flee after poking the Russian bear in the eye; more ocean cables cut and you get one guess who got blamed; G20 summit disrespects Joe Biden and not in the silly way the media reported; unemployed college boy sacrifices a body part he wasn’t using anyway and lands lucrative Congressional career triggering crisis in the House.

🌍 WORLD NEWS AND COMMENTARY 🌍

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Yesterday, Rio Grande Valley’s local ABC affiliate KRGV ran a thrilling story headlined, “Texas land commissioner offers 1,400 acres in Starr County to Trump for ‘deportation facilities’.”  ‘Land Commissioner’ is a state office with which your author, a native Floridian, is completely unfamiliar. But the great state of Texas has a lot of land, so perhaps it’s unsurprsing they need a commissioner. The incumbent’s name is Dawn Buckingham. Dawn is a doctor (an M.D.), and a bona fide bada**. Or however they say it in Texas.

Dawn is not the kind of gal to wait around for the border to solve itself, and yesterday, the state’s first woman Land Commissioner dispatched an enthusiastic letter to President-Elect Donald J. Trump, generously offering to gift to the federal government a 1,402-acre ranch located about 35 miles west of McAllen, Texas, for use as a mass deportation facility. You could not dream of a better spot for locating a large deportation center; McAllen is a mid-sized border town with an airport located a mere 90 minutes west of South Padre Island on the Gulf of Mexico.

It was exhilarating news, and it also tickled me imagining BlueSky’s wokesters competing to out-virtue-signal each other’s distress, and trying come up with a really mean nickname, like Rancho Returno or something.

Continuing in her terrific letter, Dawn grabbed the opportunity to describe to President Trump some of her border accomplishments as Texas Land Commissioner, “in the fight to repel cartel activities along our border.” I knew things were bad down there. I didn’t think anything could surprise me, but one paragraph in the letter in particular left me speechless.

Dawn described seizing new land for Texas — contested islands in the Rio Grande — to dislodge organized and heavily-armed cartels:

Holy frijoles, Batman!  For a dirty job like the one Dawn described, most people would probably think first of the INS, CBP, DEA, Homeland Security, the Department of State, or even the U.S. Armed Forces. Never, even with a million chances, would I have guessed the job of seizing borderlands and battling cartels with machine guns and explosive weapons would fall to the Texas Land Commissioner.

Our current federal government is a pitiable joke. It is a flat punchline to a bad limerick. It is totally useless, or worse than totally useless.

But Texas raises its ladies tough. They may look like sweet Texas belles on the outside, but if they spot an island in disputed territory where the boys aren’t playing nice, watch out.  Don’t mess with the Land Commissioner, and don’t mess with Texas.

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Help is on the way! Prepare to text this link to all the Democrats in your circle who were the most disappointed and disgruntled about the election results. Yesterday, CNN ran an exciting story bursting with potential promise for them headlined, “Italian village offers $1 homes to Americans upset by the US election result.” Just look! Look at how beautiful and scenic and picturesque is Ollolai, Sardinia:

Technically, the town’s official website disclosed prices for abandoned dwellings starting at €1 (one Euro), which, depending on the day, is a buck and change. But look, you can’t even buy a Snickers bar for a dollar anymore. You can’t buy a pack of gum for a dollar. And these gullible Italians are giving American leftists houses for a dollar and change!

What are you wokesters waiting for! Get packing!

Of course, there is a little bit of fine print, with which we need not bother ourselves over much. Homes in Ollolai are sold “as is,” with no returns. All sales are final. There is no warranty. AS IS.

But set that aside! The town of Ollolai is a postcard-perfect gem nestled in the rugged, sun-drenched mountains of Sardinia. Imagine stepping into a medieval village where time has slowed to a poetic crawl and the whispers of history echo through cobblestone streets lined with rustic stone houses. I mean, just look at it!

Democrats reading this exciting news need to stop reading and start acting. The preferred route is to fly to the Cagliari Elmas Airport (CAG), connecting through Rome or Frankfurt. Just forget about the rest of today’s post, and start booking your tickets, before they run out!

Sadly, Ollolai is a victim of declining birth rates. Over the last 50 years, its populaton has rapidly shrunk by more than half, from a peak of 2,250 down to its current level, hovering around 1,300 permanent residents. For some reason, the Ollolains believe left-leaning Americans can save the village from becoming a ghost town.

Ollolai Mayor Francesco Columbu promised CNN that American applications will jump to the head of the line to purchase gently-used Ollolai properties. “We just really want, and will focus on, Americans above all,” the mayor explained. “We can’t, of course, ban people from other countries to apply, but Americans will have a fast-track procedure. We are betting on them to help us revive the village, they are our winning card.”

So there you have it. Get cracking! Life as Democrats know it is not over. Now, they can easily and inexpensively make good on their threats to flee the United States. They can flee this fascism and waltz right into the welcoming arms of people who actually want them! It’s a whole new day.

Get moving Democrats! You could still make it before Trump is inaugurated!

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Especially in light of the latest developments, this morning the New York Times ran a remarkably ominous story headlined, “U.S. Closes Its Kyiv Embassy, Warning of ‘Significant Air Attack’.” The sub-headline added, “The unusual alert came a day after Ukraine used American-made ballistic missiles to strike Russian territory for the first time.” In other words, they know they poked the bear.

On Monday, with Biden’s blessing, Ukraine fired six ATACMS (“attack-ems”) ballistic missiles deep into Russia, far from the front lines and far from any combat area. Afterwards, Russia said its air defenses shot down five rockets and damaged the sixth and, while there was some property damage, thankfully no one was killed.

At a news conference yesterday, Russia’s foreign minister, Sergei Lavrov, darkly warned “We take this as a qualitatively new phase of the Western war against Russia, and we will react accordingly.”

Responding to Lavrov’s comment, the story reported that Brave Sir Robin, sorry, I mean the chicken-lipped State Department, sent an urgent cable to the U.S. Embassy in Kiev, ordering it closed and all U.S. personnel to flee and hide, I mean “shelter in place,” off-site.

The hot takes yesterday on social media went stratospheric, all predicting imminent nuclear war and the End of Everything. While I totally disagree with Biden’s decision (if it was his decision), I  caution any decisions to panic just yet. Since Trump is incoming, both Kiev and Moscow are jockeying to improve their negotiating positions before any bargaining begins, as the Times admitted:

So it is very difficult to discern what is real escalation and what is just positional bargaining. We don’t, and can’t, know.

Meanwhile yesterday, a pair of undersea fiber-optic cables in the Baltic were mysteriously ‘damaged,’ and despite having no evidence, Finland and Germany instantly accused the Russians of sabotage. Who knows. But … don’t they always first accuse Russia? And then much later on, we find out it was us all along?

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While all these perilous world events were unfolding, Joe Biden was haplessly wandering around the G20 Summit in Rio de Janiero and somehow managed to be late for the group photo of all the world leaders who attended. The AP ran the story headlined, “Photo-shoot fail: Biden, Trudeau miss traditional photo with world leaders at G20.” For some reason, the other leaders didn’t wait even though they were told Joe was coming.

Look closely at the picture. The BRICS leaders were placed in the center of the front row. Germany and France were relegated to the second row. Note carefully the conspicuous empty spot beside German Chancellor Scholz— we will come back to that.

An anonymous “senior Biden administration official,” told AP that Biden missed the photo due to unspecified “logistical issues.” Logistical issues? You mean like the fact Biden stumbles around slower than a drunken tortoise? In this next clip, listen to C-SPAN reporters freaking when the other world leaders were asked to wait for Joe, but in unison they started walking away. On purpose.

CLIP: Reporter exclaims “Oh my g—d!” as world leaders ignore requests to wait for approaching Biden to re-take group photo (1:35).

What if the real reason Biden was “late” was because right before the picture, his handlers found out they put Biden on the second row, next to the German Chancellor, in that empty slot behind South Africa? Suppose Team Biden suddenly discovered at the last minute that the BRICS countries would be placed up front?

I suspect the disrespect to Biden was intended to be much more profound than merely taking a picture without him, on time.

Imagine how it could have gone down. Might there have been furious, last-minute wrangling going on, with Biden staying back behind the palm tree, as leverage, you can’t take the picture without him, and he won’t join until he can stand in front. And then the organizers shrugged, called Biden’s bluff, and were like, fine, if he won’t stand in the back then he’s out of the picture.

Any decent reporter on the scene should have asked serious questions about Biden’s astonishing omission. Useless corporate media meekly accepted an anonymous Biden aide’s word that it was just logistical issues. This is why we go to X for news now.

Biden is now both figuratively and literally out of the picture. He has been, for some time, at least since he was castrated by his own party. I prefer to believe that next year, President Trump and his gigantic personality will occupy in the middle of the G20 front row. And, if he is a little late, they’ll wait to take their picture. Plus, I bet they wouldn’t scurry off if they heard President Trump was coming. What do you think?

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Finally yesterday, MSNBC ran a snarky, motive-imputing story headlined, “Nancy Mace wants to welcome the first openly trans member of Congress with a bathroom ban.” You can thank  Delaware voters, who elected Tim “Sarah” McBride as the nation’s first openly cross-dressing Congressman, er, Congresswoman, um, oh fine, Congressperson.  Despite MSNBC’s paranoia that radical Christians are racing around trying to hamper its bizarre sexual adventurism, the nation just shrugged and asked, again, “am I taking crazy pills?”

You can’t blame Tim, I mean Sarah, or whatever they call xeselves. He turned his poor employment prospects into her lucrative career in federal politics. And it only hurt them a little. He, I mean she, they, doesn’t have multiple personalities, they just refer to xeselves in the plural third person because of science. And don’t call them crazy! They’re not crazy, are they, my precious, hmm….?

Sorry, I got distracted. The developing story was that, upon hearing of McBride’s glass-skirt shattering election, rape survivor and feisty South Carolina Congresswoman Nancy Mace (R-S.C.) became distressed at the notion of sharing the Congressional ladies’ room with Tim-Sarah and his, I mean her, its, xers, or rather their special package. So Nancy, the biological woman in this equation, filed a resolution that, if passed, would require House members, officers, and employees to use the bathrooms and locker rooms of their biological sex.

Hoo boy. It erupted like a stick of dynamite dropped into a porta-potty. MSNBC reported that Mace’s resolution “sparked outrage among Democrats,” which was an understatement on the scale of calling the Hindenburg Disaster an “unpleasant balloon ride.”

No shrinking violet, Georgia’s firey Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) joined forces with Mace and publicly promised to fight McBride if she ever finds him in a ladies’ room anywhere in the House. It’s not quite like fighting cartels armed with grenade launchers, but Ms. Greene has all the spunk and fire of a Texas Land Commissioner.

I wish there were more strong men like all the strong ladies in today’s post. Affable Speaker Mike Johnson (R-La.) was hectored by deranged reporters all day about Rep. Mace’s proper-potty resolution. In his first effort, mild-mannered Speaker Johnson disappointingly tried much too hard to be politically correct, amiably urging mutual respect for everyone and genially saying nothing of substance.

But at least Johnson fixed it a little later. Maybe he watched his uninspiring performance. Either way, he re-emerged at the press podium and this time, quoting Scripture as authority, definitively stated that wearing skirts and lipstick does not magically transform men into women, as if that needed saying (which, astonishingly, it did and still does).

CLIP: Speaker Johnson clarifies his earlier statements, thank goodness (0:42).

I believe this story is much bigger than just a kerfuffle in the Congressional toilet, or even than transphobia! in the House of Representatives! Should the House pass Mace’s resolution, which by some accounts does not go far enough, it will cast a dark shadow of precedent across the nation. Pro-women activists nationwide can use the House resolution to argue for similar ordinances and rules in their own locales. If it’s good enough for Congress…

Indeed, since McBride is the first cross-dressing Congressman to sashay into the House of Representatives, this is the first time the House has been forced to grapple with the incendiary bathroom/locker-room issue. The Republicans hold the majority and can easily pass a sensible resolution like Mace’s. Will they have the courage to do it, in the face of a coordinated captive media war ben on their political destruction?

I hope so! We will soon find out. What do you think they’ll do?

Have a wonderful Wednesday! Thank your local land commissioner, and then come on back, y’all, tomorrow morning, for more delicious and nutritious Coffee & Covid news and commentary.

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