☕️ MISSION POSSIBLE ☙ Monday, May 12, 2025 ☙ C&C NEWS 🦠

Apocalyptic trade war cools as stocks soar; Trump spikes pharma panic with price-cut tweet; AOC eyes White House; peace talks follow Trump tweet; EU leaders star in cocaine train farce.

Good morning, C&C, it’s Monday! Your white-hot roundup this morning includes: the apocalyptic trade war with China simmers down and stocks rocket up, following excellent investment advice from the Oval Office; Trump dominates news cycle with tweet about lower drug prices and media melts down over pharma stock portfolios; AOC teases presidential run to the delight of many aging boomers as well as yours truly; Trump makes huge progress in proxy war with single all-caps tweet; and Euro leaders caught in embarrassing cocaine train contretemps.

🌍 WORLD NEWS AND COMMENTARY 🌍

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In today’s first “Mission Impossible” story, we will recall that last week, President Trump offered Americans a stock tip, urging that it was time to buy. Keeping that promise, early this morning Al Jazeera ran a story headlined, “China and US agree to 90-day tariff suspension as trade war talks extended.” Global markets surged, with rising stock markets in Hong Kong, the U.S., and Europe.

The US and China issued a joint statement in the wee hours following two days of trade talks in Geneva, Switzerland. The talks, which came after President Trump created the need for emergency talks with a “spiral of increasingly heavy duties,” were called positive. Negotiators “agreed to suspend some of the heavy trade tariffs imposed against one another as they prepare to extend negotiations aimed at lowering trade war tensions.”

Tariffs, some reaching as high as 150%, will be dialed back to 10% across the board. China agreed to drop its tariffs and remove its “non-tariff countermeasures.” That last is code for unofficial punishments like regulatory harassment, slowed customs clearance, or just pretending the call went straight to voice mail.

When Trump first launched his tariff blitz, the media had an absolute meltdown. Pundits shrieked like naptime toddlers about a looming financial apocalypse, breathlessly predicting empty shelves, collapsing markets, hyperinflation, and the return of Dust Bowl-era bread lines. The Atlantic warned of a “global recession triggered by reckless trade brinksmanship.” CNN trotted out every retired Fed official they could find to caution that tariffs would crater consumer confidence and “devastate the middle class.”

Exempli gratia, behold this overwrought headline from Irresponsible Statecraft, one month ago:

The only thing missing was a tariff-fueled nuclear doomsday ticker in Times Square.

But once again, reality refused to cooperate with media’s dreams— and instead of a catastrophe, Trump got Chinese concessions and another stock market rally. Tariff Doomsday failed to show up for the breakfast buffet and hasn’t even checked in to the hotel.

What corporate media called “impossible,” Trump called “Sunday.”

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Maybe it’s more accurate to say most of the market rallied. In the latest example of a news cycle driven by social media posts, late yesterday, the UK Guardian ran a story headlined, “Pharmaceutical stocks slide as Trump vows to cut US prescription drug prices ‘by 30-80%.’” It is so darn amusing how the President has forced the media to stick up for its real customer: Big Pharma.

Yesterday, President Trump tweeted a long post saying he will sign an order this morning that will reduce prescription drug and pharmaceutical prices “almost immediately” by “30% to 80%.” A few hours before he made the announcement, Trump posted: “My next TRUTH will be one of the most important and impactful I have ever issued. ENJOY!”

None of the stories, including the Guardian’s, included the President’s actual message, preferring to cherry-pick bits of it. So here it is:

Trump’s reference to the “Most Favored Nation” policy suggests that his order will require the U.S. government to pay the same prices for drugs as other countries. As we all well know, most other countries pay much lower prices for medications. For example, the list price for diabetes medicine Jardiance is $611 for a 30-day in the US, compared with $70 in Switzerland and only $35 in Japan.

I couldn’t find any headline celebrating falling drug prices — corporate media was obsessed with how the executive order (which nobody’s even seen yet) would hurt pharmaceutical stocks. I think the media has lost the plot. Trump essentially promised to cut costs for sick people, and the media’s hair is on fire over hedge fund portfolio losses.

Under any other president, the media would be rolling out statistics about how much the average person pays for their prescriptions and how much the potential savings could be, and how the economy might surge because all that money could be spent on more productive things. If Biden had made the same announcement, every major outlet would’ve run with glowing human-interest profiles: Meet the grandmother whose insulin just became affordable thanks to bold leadership.

Under Biden, a $35 insulin cap was hailed as a historic breakthrough; under Trump, an 80% slash across the board is treated like economic terrorism. Trump could cure cancer, and they’d run with headlines like, “Biotech layoffs surge after oncology disruption.”

So to recap: Trump promises lower drug prices, and the media is as outraged as if he’d just clubbed a baby seal on the trading floor. Their outrage wasn’t over what sick Americans pay— it’s over what Pfizer’s shareholders might lose. If you ever wondered who corporate media really works for, wonder no more. They’re not covering the cost of our meds; they’re covering for the people charging us six hundred bucks for a bottle of tainted sugar pills.

The media hysterically predicted economic catastrophe, yet here we are: gas prices are stabilizing, egg prices have eased, inflation has bottomed out, jobs are bursting, and prescription drug costs are poised to drop significantly. In fact, prices have plunged so fast the media is now running scare stories about the perils of falling costs. It’s almost as if the so-called “reckless” policies are delivering results.

Maybe the real impossible mission is getting the media to admit it.

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Oh, please do it. Where can I buy some bumper stickers? Yesterday, the Wall Street Journal ran a story headlined, “AOC Isn’t Ruling Anything Out, Including the White House.” The sub-headline warned, “Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s rise to prominence worries some Democrats who say the base is taking the wrong lessons from the 2024 election.” The WSJ called her “one of the party’s leading voices.”

According to a “person familiar with her thinking,” who the Journal did not name, Ms. Ocasio-Cortez hasn’t made any decisions about her future, but the saucy former bartender isn’t ruling anything out, including primarying Senate minority leader Chuck Schumer— or even a presidential run.

Progressive boomers seem to love her. Patrick Barrett, 83, is a retiree who had time to attend a recent town hall in Arizona. He told the Journal that, despite “aligning with a more traditional wing of the party,” he plans to support Ms. Ocasio-Cortez if she runs for president. She “is a good bridge between those younger people with experiences, minorities, very very urban attuned to all of that, but also working class as hell,” Mr. Barrett gushed.

Almost impossibly, the same media that melts down over Trump tweets is now flirting with a 30-something socialist influencer whose economic plan is based on sour mix and cranberry liqueur. Her greatest achievement was once being top tip-getter on ladies’ night. If this is the Democrats’ big post-2024 reset, pass the popcorn.

At least under President AOC, drinks would be on the house.

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Yesterday, CNN ran a proxy war story under the misleading headline, “Zelensky challenges Putin’s offer to meet after Russia ignores ceasefire demand.” The story is, after US President Donald Trump urged the former comedian to “immediately” accept the Russian leader’s offer to hold peace talks in Turkey on Thursday, Zelensky agreed.

It’s still just a “somebody-said-something” story, but it marked a tectonic shift: until now, Mr. Green Sweatshirt refused any direct talks. In fact, in 2022, Zelensky passed a law forbidding negotiations with Putin as long as the Russian president remains in office. Meanwhile, useless European leaders spent all day yesterday in Kiev belligerantly blustering that there could be no peace talks without an “unconditional ceasefire” first.

But in a rare 1am address, Putin ignored the ceasefire demands entirely, and simply responded that Russia would show up in Turkey on Thursday to talk peace.

In its article, CNN bitterly complained that President Trump had “undermined” the Europeans’ “efforts to pressure Putin” by tweeting, “HAVE THE MEETING NOW!!!”

An hour later, Zelensky flip-flopped and agreed to attend the talks— the countries’ first meeting since the start of the war. Regardless of what happens on Thursday, the fact that the peace conference is happening at all evidences tangible progress toward resolving the war.

Frankly, I’m already happy. Before the election, I had three demands for Ukraine. First, fix our own border before worrying about Ukraine. Trump did that. Second, stop shoveling billions into Zelensky’s war chest while our debt explodes. Also check. Finally, de-escalate the World War III brinksmanship. Thankfully, all three have been accomplished. From here out, it’s all gravy as far as I am concerned.

Until Trump tweeted in, direct negotiations remained impossible. If we had an honest media, today’s headline should have been: “Trump Brokers Historic Peace Talks With One All-Caps Tweet.” Mission Impossible.

🔥 Early this morning, Politico ran a wildly deceptive story headlined, “Macron’s office hits back at cocaine train claims. But the one thing missing from Politico’s story (and every other corporate media account)— was the actual video clip that set social media ablaze. So watch it for yourself:

CLIP: European leaders quickly stash the evidence when the cameras come on (0:05).

Yesterday, three EU leaders rode the rails into Kiev to deliver their ceasefire ultimatum: UK Prime Minister Kier Starmer, French President Emmanuel Macron, and German Chancellor Friedrich Merz. Due to war conditions, travel into Ukraine requires taking a train from Poland. Someone walked into their private traincar to film the “historic” meeting— and caught a frantic, sneaky cleanup instead.

The now-viral clip shows the men sitting down. Merz suddenly notices a tiny bronze spoon on the table and sweeps it away like the Miami DEA just kicked the door in. Then he gives Macron a look. Macron picks up on it, glances down, sees a small crumpled white paper, casually drops his hand over it, then slowly slides it off the table—like a man disappearing a spare ace card he hopes no one saw.

Twitter sleuths pounced, claiming the objects were a recreational cocaine spoon and a drug wrapper. Personally, I would not know. But if they hadn’t panicked and scrambled to hide the evidence, nobody probably would have noticed. The French government’s explanation —just a “soiled tissue”— might have even worked. (Not only did CNN fail to link the clip, but it also failed to mention Merz’s tiny spoon, which is harder to explain. You don’t bring a micro spoon unless you came to party.)

The tissue excuse is thinner than they think. Again, I have no personal knowledge, but I have been assured that crumpled Kleenex are also de rigueur for snorting sessions. They’re used for wiping nosebleeds, dusting off residual powder, and handling post-line sniffles. So maybe it was a tissue. Or, to be fair, since it was laying right in front of President Macron, maybe it was just his little white flag.

But by all appearances, Macron, Starmer, and Merz were riding the Pineapple Express to Kiev to conduct high-level diplomacy. Get it? High level? Anyway. It was less Mission Impossible and more Macron and Starmer Go to Kiev’s White Castle. They didn’t get a cease-fire, but they definitely picked up a case of the munchies.

So: are Europe’s most powerful elites just coked-up war tourists making trillion-euro decisions between bumps? Is this powdered diplomacy at its finest? The corporate media called it “fake news”—which, these days, is the surest sign it probably isn’t.

Watch the clip. And believe your own lying eyes.

Have a magnificent Monday! Then ride the C&C Express back here tomorrow morning, for another stimulating dose of essential news and commentary.

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