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Rob D's avatar

When I was growing up, I was taught that I should always open the door for a lady, pull out her chair for her, walk on the curb side while strolling, and many other chivalrous things that men were supposed to do for the "fairer sex". In around the 1980s I held the door open for a lady and she went in the other door (after looking at me with a face that said something like, "what's wrong with you? Do you think I can't open the door for myself?), then when in a group of lovely women one time I said something to the effect of, "I'm so happy to be surrounded by all of you lovely ladies". One of these women scowled while asking, "who are you calling a lady?" Needless to say, I don't go out of my way anymore. Nah. If women don't want to be worshiped by men than so-be-it. The only women I treat the way I was taught are the ones in my family, and the elderly women (who still remember when men were allowed to treat them with a bit of extra care). Ladies, if you want men... let us be men. Let us do what we were naturally created to do... to take care of you. If you constantly give of an air of "I don't need you" well, guess what? We will gladly comply and you can fend for yourselves. Sorry, it's just a fact.

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St. Alia the Knife's avatar

I read a little blurb back in the day, maybe late 80s-early 90s, and I can't remember where, but it was telling, even then.

A man and a woman were approaching the door to an office building. The man opened the door for the young woman and motioned for her to enter ahead of him. The woman snapped, "Don't open the door for me because I am a lady!" The man smiled and gently said, "I did not open the door for you because you are a lady. I opened the door for you because I am a gentleman."

I always thought it was a great double zinger!

Mrs. "the Knife"

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Debra's avatar

Right here is a great example of parental failure for that young woman.

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Eli's avatar

When a man opens a door for me I always smile and say "thank you sir." Those of us who appreciate your old fashioned manners are still out there. You might want to try again :)

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Lori's avatar

I do as well and add in thank you for not giving up on all women!

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alongername's avatar

Too late Lori ! hahaha ( just kidding)

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Tapestrygarden's avatar

Me too! So appreciate it!

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Jake's avatar

Going into the Dollar Store this morning I got there before two women. One Latino and one Black. I opened the door and let them go ahead of me. Both said thank you sir. I'm an old white guy from Minnesota don't ya know.

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RunningLogic's avatar

Exactly!!

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JacquelineP's avatar

I do too - AND I also hold the door open for other people (men and women) when the occasion arises. I consider it courteous.

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Lori's avatar

Chivalry rocks! My father still after 50 years of marriage, stood up when my mom left the table and when she came back, he held her chair out for her. He opened her car door for her and showed her such tender courtesy. It was beautiful to behold.

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Mark D.'s avatar

❤️ I will sprint around the other side of the car to get my wife’s door

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Lori's avatar

You are a keeper and a good man/hubby!

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Mark D.'s avatar

Aw thanks, she deserves that and much more 🙏

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Ruth H's avatar

I was showing my youngest grandson to open the door and hold it for girls and grandmothers. He definitely took it to heart and now opens the door for me.

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TW's avatar

We are trying to teach our young sons to be chivalrous. The oldest is 10, youngest is 6 and they frequently forget, but sometimes they'll remember spontaneously to stand when i enter the room. They've had debates over whether to stand when i go to the kitchen during dinner, since there's only a bar separating the two spaces. It's very sweet :)

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Lori's avatar

Thank you for sharing this. Good manners and chivalry never go out of style:}

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mary's avatar

My son does the same for me and other women. I taught him when he was young to treat his sister and women gently and with respect. He is married to a wonderful woman who adores him. I did one thing correctly.

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Lori's avatar

Yes you did but I am sure you have done other things correctly too. You were and are integral to your son's life's resume:}

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Pat Wetzel's avatar

I personally love and notice those wonderful "old world" gestures.

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M2's avatar

You can open a door for me and call me lovely anytime.

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RunningLogic's avatar

I personally love it when a man opens the door for me and will give him a warm smile and heartfelt “thank you” for it!!

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St. Alia the Knife's avatar

Me, too, also!

Mrs. "the Knife"

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Jacquijacq's avatar

I don’t want to be treated equal to you ….

I want to be treated better than you!!! (Credit Blanch Devereaux)

😉😂

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CJ's avatar

🤣🤣🤣 That's perfect.

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dancingtime's avatar

Some thoughts: Not all women are ladies. I am selective when I use it.

By the 80s, we were still reeling from the 60/70s femlib movement. I was an adult then and I could talk your ear off concerning the damage that it has done. However, that said, in the late 60s I joined Navy when men did not want us there, we were seen as whores, and Navy wives thought that we were after their husbands. There was a real need for women to be able to pursue jobs for which they gad aptitude. But like all movements, it became hijacked by radicals.

Everyone has 24 hours a day. You can never have it all and do it all well...but you can kill yourself trying.

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Notes from the Under Dog L.'s avatar

Intriguing comment. I've been considering this angle -- that the unmarried, unattached women -- no matter how progressive the company -- are viewed as a threat.

Truly the most effective society is one where people marry young, and stay married -- and that means both parties doing the work to keep it going.

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Guy White's avatar

A Biblical fact.

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MattieRoss's avatar

Opening a door for a woman is simply the man’s way of showing her honor and esteeming her more highly than himself. It is NOT a bad thing.

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alongername's avatar

I always open a car door for a woman .

Sometimes......even when we're still moving 😉😂

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Mark D.'s avatar

That reminds me: I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa- not screaming and terror like the passengers in his car 😆

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MayBella82's avatar

Love this… there are a few who should be pushed out!!

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Debra's avatar

Just a few days ago a kind young man held the door for me and I said "Thank you kind sir!" We both smiled.

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Karen Bandy's avatar

I always appreciate politeness, from men and women and I am quick to respond in kind.

Some people are just rude and breeze thru the open door, for example, and sometimes I will say ‘you’re welcome’ just to be a snarky biotch, other times I just ignore their rudeness but I never stop.

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SB's avatar

Yea. I went out for drinks after work one day with colleagues. I don’t remember what was said but one of them when I was leaving said something like “bummer all the good looking people will be gone” or something. Everyone but me was a guy (I’m a software engineer). Another male colleague quickly jumped in to defend the commenter “don’t be upset, he didn’t mean anything by it.” It was so sad. This was over a decade ago. I turned and thanked the commenter for a compliment then I told the other guy “you know, I grew up in the south, my daddy was a tobacco farmer, I’ve been cat called by drive by vehicles since I was 16, I’m not easily offended.” Now, the VP who came to a group all hands and dropped f bombs and cursed like a sailor the whole meeting, yea that pissed me off.

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MayBella82's avatar

When I was teaching my son to drive, I would have him open the passenger door for me (still does at 27). Also opening doors for others…. Ladies and elderly. A few years back, he called me when he was in college to tell me I was rights. A girl he had liked for a year, he had the opportunity to drive her home. He opened her door for her. When he asked her out, she said yes because he had manners. They are getting married next year now that he has his PHD. She is a lovely girl that I can’t wait to call my daughter. Manners matter.

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Peter's avatar

That was no lady

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RJ Rambler's avatar

I'm sorry that you laid down your sword to such sneering ignorance. The others may have just been too shocked to respond but you only heard the loudest b*. Who's the fool?

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